Me: Hey Facebook! I cleaned some stuff!
Facebook: Congratulations...?
Me: No, really, I got out the broom and everything!
Facebook: ...
Me: But not the mop. That's too much trouble.
Facebook: OK
Me: Also, I exercised!
Facebook: That's nice.
Me: I did! For real! Like an actual adult!
Facebook: OK.
Me: I am accomplishing adult things! Like a real adult person!
Facebook: Aren't you 37?
Me: 38!
Facebook: Here are some pictures of cats.
Me: KITTIES!!!
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