originally posted 8/8/20
“The Enterprise’s search for famous scientist Roger leads Kirk to a deserted planet where Roger, who lives with two lifelike androids, turns on Kirk.”
First off, that title is cringey af. Secondly, he’s Roger. Just Roger. He may have a last name (or first? I don’t know) but Netflix declares him to just be Roger.
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Nurse Chapel and her new weird wig are on the bridge. Evidently Roger hasn’t sent a message for two years. They have some kind of (likely romantic) connection.
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Uhura’s in red again this episode.
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The surface of the planet is 110 degrees below American zero. We will not acknowledge that commie Celsius system of measurement, scientific community be damned!
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Roger has a last name - Korby - and for some reason is “the Pasteur of archaeological medicine.” Ok.
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They’ve found him - dramatic closeup on
Nurse Showrunner’s Mistress!
Ok, that’s not fair to Majel Barrett, considering they did get married and stayed together until his death, but Roddenberry was married when he had an affair with her, and was kind of a lech who gave her the role of Number One because of the affair. So really it’s Gene Roddenberry who’s questionable. Without her there’d be no Lwaxana Troi. Take that as you will (I like the character).
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Kirk and Chapel beamed isn’t but Korby didn’t meet them, so they’ve been joined by two redshirts. Let’s see what happens to them...especially they one they left by himself...
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Korby’s assistant Brown makes a dramatic entrance, and then the redshirt who came with Kirk and Chapel falls into a bottomless pit. As one does.
Oh wait, he was pushed by an evil-looking green guy! Further research reveals he’s 6’9” actor Ted Cassidy, who played Lurch on The Addams Family. I feel like this is foreshadowing Lwaxana Troi’s butler, Mr. Homn.
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Now Lurch has found the other redshirt. Welp.
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Enter Andrea, wearing the same weird overalls as Brown, but without the shirt. Extremely wide green and blue stripes all around!
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Korby wants to take Kirk prisoner but Kirk is fighting back - he shoots Brown, revealing him to be an android, and Lurch enters in his Martian Manhunter cape and holds Kirk up in the air, as one does.
Also - Andrea the Android? Really? Yes, it hasn’t been revealed yet, but I remember that part.
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Lurch can mimic Kirk’s voice. That’s a thing. Also, turns out his name is Rok.
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Rok is good at flinging people.
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Chapel doesn’t like when Andrea calls Korby “Roger,” so Korby tells her to call him Dr. Korby. Because that makes it better. Also, it’s the 60s so women be jealous...
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Now that Andrea is revealed to be an android, it’s kind of funny that Nurse Chapel is a bit repulsed by her fiancé building a very lifelike Real Doll. “It’s just my sexbot, darling, she means nothing! She’s just a totally logical computer that blows me on command!”
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They’re making a new android. Andrea’s job: have prominent nipples and turn a dial.
Oh dear, it’s a Kirkbot. Double the Shatner, double the fun!
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So evidently Kirk is programming his double to be racist toward Vulcans in the hope that Spock gets the message.
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Andrea, to Nurse Chapel: I am now programmed to please you also. Is the food appealing?
Bad Roddenberry. No!
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So, if you’re a mad scientist wanting to replace humans with androids, you shouldn’t have chairs decorated with ropes your prisoners can remove to strangle you with. Just a thought.
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Kirk just ripped a very phallic stalactite off the cave ceiling and I’m pretty sure we aren’t supposed to giggle about it.
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Rok is impersonating Chapel, and Kirk pretends to fall for it so he can hit him with the dick rock. Unfortunately Rok gets then dick rock away from him and pushes him over a precipice. Kirk is totally hanging by one hand and not just standing on the floor. Rok then unexpectedly lifts him to safety.
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Android Kirk is on the Enterprise. The casual racism program appears to have tipped Spock off.
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Real Kirk is creepily kissing Andrea, but she declares that she is not programmed for him. Ewww...
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Turns out the Old Ones who built Rok were destroyed by their androids. He turns on Korby, who disintegrates him with a phaser.
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Oh hey, Korby’s an android too. Shocking.
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So Andrea kills android-Kirk thinking the real Kirk has escaped, and then when android-Korby starts having a breakdown about not being the real Korby, she kisses him and disintegrates them both. Convenient ending...
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Spock objects to the term “half-breed.”
Who doesn’t? At least the acknowledgement of it being offensive makes it good code for “this is a fake Kirk.”
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